Is it courageous to simply be?

Ah, Carl Rogers, a man I am completely sick of hearing about over the last seven years of my life. As a former counselling student, I can’t imagine a life before I knew about Carl Rogers, and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or bad thing.

Carl Rogers is a man that pioneered the humanistic approach to counselling, which is actually amazing, and is my preferred way of counselling. But Carl Rogers in general, is a name I’m tired of, and yet I’ve said it four times already.

When I loaded up my Facebook memories today, I was greeted with a quote from, said fellow, that I shared from three years ago.

“This process of the good life is not, I’m convinced, a life for the feint-hearted. It involves the stretching and growing of becoming more and more of one’s potentialities. It involves the courage to be. It means launching oneself fully into the stream of life.”

Along with the quote I wrote, “My life feels more like white water rapids than a stream.” And in true former counselling student style, I couldn’t help but reflect on that.

When I think of white water rapids, it brings me the feeling of chaos, smashing into the odd rock and being thrown off course, and generally being somewhere unsafe and not somewhere I want to be. (This may be due to my fear of water, but we’ll go with it.) Feeling that sense on uncertainty again brought back how I felt in 2017 and I compared it to my 2020.

2020 was horrific. It has been for everyone and my 2020 didn’t end as it was meant to. I was supposed to be a fully qualified counsellor and have my baby girl in my arms, but I guess the dingy I was being flung around rapids in hit a really big rock, and I fell out.

Soaked and frightened, I imagine myself clung to the rocks at the side of the rapids, almost being drowned or swept away. But I found the strength to pull myself out, only to stand up and realise there was a peaceful stream running right alongside the rapids. A stream that I’d never seen before.

The peaceful stream has smooth water, and has gorgeous greenery running along each side of it, big trees and pink flowers. It’s quiet and a world away from the rapids, and better still, instead of a dingy, there’s a safe, white boat waiting for me.

The more I’ve thought about the quote, the more I’ve come to think that maybe it’s not so much just being in the stream of life that’s courageous? The stream is a given, we’re all in a stream! It might be a boring stream, it might be rapids, it could be a stream that leads out to a great sea, or maybe some pesky ducks live near it. Is it courageous to simply be?

I suppose good old Carl is right in that it is courageous to get in our boat and sail or roll up our trousers and paddle in our stream, but I guess what I’m saying is, what felt more courageous to me was getting out of my stream and finding a new one.

To stay on my very unsafe dingy and continue hanging on for dear life doesn’t feel courageous to me, the imagery of dragging myself up what feels like a cliff face feels courageous, don’t you think?

Maybe I’m focusing on the stream part of this metaphor too harshly, but it just stood out to me.
What kind of a stream do you see yourself in?