It really feels as if self-care is everywhere right now; it’s in magazines, it’s on the TV, and there’s quotes online reminded you about it. Not to mention it being drilled into my head weekly at university, because when studying counselling you’re supposed to become some kind of self-care god or goddess!
Despite this, I’ve always found the concept of self-care a hard one to get my head around, because what is it?
I feel like self-care is marketed as running yourself a bath, maybe throwing a bath bomb in there too, having a skin care routine and making a hot chocolate that’s brimming with marshmallows. While I love these things, none of them feel like self-care to me. I get a bath when I want to zone out or take some time out to think for a while with no distractions. I have a skin care routine every night and I hate it; it doesn’t feel like self-care, it feels like a chore! And not to mention I much prefer a cuppa tea over a hot chocolate any day. So how am I supposed to self-care when I don’t like what it’s supposed to be?
Despite having the idea of self-care drilled into me, I have still learnt a lot more about it through lockdown (all three of them, thanks Boris) than I ever did on any course I’ve been on. I’ve ultimately learnt that self-care is anything that makes you feel that bit better, and actually isn’t exclusively anything in particular.
All my life I’ve relied on music to make me feel human again, like a blanket that’s been in the dryer that then gets draped around your shoulders; music makes me feel warm and comforted.
This time last year I didn’t have a lot of time for anything really, in between working in a supermarket, working at my placement, writing a novel, trying to be a good cat mother, fiancée, daughter, sister and friend, all while growing my own human, there wasn’t much time to spare. But the one thing I always had time for was music; even if it was just a ten minute listen on in the car on the way work or placement. I often found it quite amusing, imagining my colleagues or clients seeing me pulling up at placement with A Day To Remember blaring from my car. Nothing days ‘great counsellor that’s ready for the day’ than listening to 2nd Sucks so loud it makes the car mirrors vibrate right?
Self-care, in my eyes, should take you away from any ‘title’ you hold and give you some time to just be you for a moment. We all need to sit back and relax once in a while! Even if life is filled with a whole lot of nothing, like it is for a lot of people right now, it’s important to take a step back and realise that the vacuuming, or the giant pile of washing can wait an hour, or a day (or two) while you take care of yourself and your own needs.
The pandemic has stripped everyone back to beyond the basics and made us all reflect on what we like to do and what makes us feel human. Whether that be the human contact we’re missing, or whether it be the One Direction or Emo phase people have regressed back to!
Self-care comes in all shapes and sizes and there’s no right or wrong!
What’s your self-care look like?
Gwen Richards 